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Do’s and Don’ts of Negotiation. Learn from Experts.

Mastering the do’s and don’ts of negotiation can mean the difference between a deal that moves your business forward and one that holds you back. Whether you’re closing a major contract or simply asking for a raise, knowing how to navigate a negotiation with confidence is a critical skill. In this article, we’ll break down the essential strategies to help you negotiate effectively—and the common pitfalls to avoid.

 

Do’s of Negotiation

1. Do Prepare Thoroughly

  • Research the other party’s background, market position, and negotiation history.

  • Understand what they want, what they fear, and what success looks like for them.

  • Define your own objectives clearly, including your ideal outcome, acceptable compromise, and walk-away point.

  • Prepare data, examples, and reasoning to support your position.

2. Do Listen More Than You Speak

  • Ask thoughtful, open-ended questions (e.g., “What’s most important to your team?”).

  • Pay attention to both verbal and nonverbal cues—tone, hesitation, or excitement can be revealing.

  • Active listening earns trust and helps uncover hidden priorities or deal breakers.

  • Summarize what you hear to show understanding and build rapport.

3. Do Build a Relationship

  • Start with light conversation or common ground to create a relaxed atmosphere.

  • Show genuine interest in their perspective and business needs.

  • Long-term relationships often lead to better terms and smoother collaborations.

  • People tend to say “yes” to those they trust and feel respected by.

4. Do Stay Calm and Professional

  • Keep your emotions in check—even when faced with frustration or provocation.

  • Speak slowly, breathe deeply, and focus on the issue, not the personalities.

  • A calm demeanor positions you as a strong and rational negotiator.

  • Being emotionally grounded can help de-escalate tense moments.

5. Do Focus on Interests, Not Positions

  • A “position” is what someone says they want; an “interest” is why they want it.

  • For example, “I need a lower price” (position) vs. “My budget is limited this quarter” (interest).

  • Identifying interests allows for creative solutions that meet both sides’ needs.

  • Avoid zero-sum thinking—many deals can be expanded or restructured for mutual gain.

6. Do Be Willing to Walk Away

  • Know your BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement) before entering the room.

  • The stronger your alternative, the more confident you’ll be in rejecting a bad deal.

  • Communicate politely but firmly if something doesn’t meet your criteria.

  • Walking away can sometimes bring the other party back with better terms.

7. Do Clarify and Confirm

  • Recap what has been agreed upon at key moments during the discussion.

  • Ask, “Just to confirm, we’re agreeing on X, with delivery by Y—correct?”

  • After the meeting, send a follow-up email summarizing all points to avoid misunderstandings.

  • Clarity now prevents costly confusion later.


Don’ts of Negotiation  

1. Don’t Rush the Process

  • Hurrying can cause you to overlook important details or miss red flags.

  • Rushed negotiations often result in deals that are poorly thought out or unbalanced.

  • Let the conversation unfold at a pace that allows trust to build and ideas to surface.

  • If you’re feeling pressured, pause or suggest reconvening.

2. Don’t Make Assumptions

  • Don’t assume you know their goals, limitations, or deal flexibility.

  • You might assume price is the top priority, when timing or quality may matter more.

  • Use curiosity and questioning to uncover real motivations.

  • Avoid stereotyping based on previous negotiations or personal bias.

3. Don’t Show All Your Cards Too Early

  • Revealing your bottom line early removes leverage.

  • Start with ambitious yet justifiable proposals to give room for concessions.

  • Let the other party show their hand first, if possible.

  • Share information strategically to build trust without weakening your position.

4. Don’t Neglect the Long-Term Relationship

  • A short-term win achieved through manipulation or pressure can burn bridges.

  • Negotiation isn’t war—it’s the start of a potential partnership.

  • Keep tone respectful and leave the door open for future collaboration.

  • Consider: Would you want to do business with someone who treated you this way?

5. Don’t Bluff Unless You Can Back It Up

  • Bluffing without substance is risky—once discovered, it can destroy credibility.

  • If you say you have other offers or better pricing, be ready to prove it.

  • Confidence is powerful, but dishonesty can end a deal or lead to legal issues.

  • Instead of bluffing, frame your limits with assertiveness and clarity.

6. Don’t Talk Too Much

  • The more you say, the more likely you are to give away key information.

  • Silence can be a powerful tactic—let the other side fill the space.

  • Make your point clearly, then pause and wait for a response.

  • Don’t try to justify every proposal at length; let the strength of the offer speak for itself.

7. Don’t Agree Without Understanding the Details

  • Don’t sign anything until you’ve read and reviewed all terms.

  • Ask questions if language is unclear or technical.

  • Understand what’s expected of each party, including timelines, costs, and contingencies.

  • A handshake is good; a clear contract is better.

Cheat Sheet Expanded Below:

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Negotiation Quotes

  • “Any negotiation involves compromise and no one will get everything they want.” ~Nicky Morgan
  • “Successful negotiation is not about getting to ‘yes’; it’s about mastering ‘no’ and understanding what the path to an agreement is.” ~Chris Voss
  • “Power is based on perception. If you think you got it, you got it, even if you don’t got it.” ~Herb Cohen
  • “During a negotiation, it would be wise not to take anything personally. If you leave personalities out of it, you will be able to see opportunities more objectively.” ~Brian Koslow

Negotiation Resources

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